Ho Ho NO!

I am soooo tired of hearing how offended everyone is about everything! It's gotten to the point where anytime you say anything at all, SOMEONE is taking it the wrong way.

Don't agree? Well listen to this! Ho Ho Ho is banned in some malls! Yeah, you know the phrase that we've heard Santa say for how long now? For freakin' ever! THAT'S HOW LONG! Funny, when I was a little girl crawling up on Santa's lap and he said, "Ho Ho Ho" to me I didn't think he was calling me a slut. The thought never crossed my mind. IT WAS SANTA FOR GOD'S SAKE!
Well I guess someone out there finds this offensive because in certain places "management" doesn't want it said. They want Santa to start saying, "Ha Ha Ha". Please.

I'm so tired of walking on eggshells to try to please everyone! What's next? We can't say "Bless you" anymore when someone sneezes because we're violating their freedom of religion? OR maybe I'm sexually harassing my coworker when I tell him a customer was a pain in the ass? I mean ass IS in the sentence, it could be taken as sexual.

Why doesn't everyone just lighten the hell up? Why are people constantly searching for ways to be victimized?

That's some good shit.

Kids will do ANYTHING for a buzz. I remember when I first heard of 'huffing'. I thought the idea of breathing in spray paint fumes to get high was the stupidest thing someone could do.

I stand corrected.

If you haven't already heard of Jenkem, let me introduce you. These crazy kids have reached a new low. And boy do I mean LOW! Jenkem is a mixture of human feces & urine that is fermented in a jar. Once it's nice and ripe, a balloon is attached to the top of the jar where the gas seeps into & it is then inhaled. THEY INHALE THE SHIT FUMES!!! It is said to give the user a euphoric response similar to ingesting cocaine but with hallucinogenic effects.

Now, I know some of you out there will say, "But Jenny. That's just an urban myth; something made up to scare people." And my answer to you will be this. Even if it BEGAN as an urban myth, somewhere out there someone has done it. Just to see if it works.

So be aware. If your kids start having an unusual interest in pooping, and you don't hear the toilet flush. It's Jenkem.

FREE stuff from Walmart!

I've waited to post this until I was absolutely sure it was legit. You can get FREE STUFF from Walmart, and there is no catch whatsoever.

Simply go to Walmart.com. Then under the "In Stores Now" tab, go to "Free Samples". I started doing this about a month ago and have gotten so mant items my husband finally asked me what the deal was with all the Walmart stuff.

This month they only have a few things to offer, but last month I got coffee, lotion, shampoo, exfoliating wash, crackers and post it notes. So GO GET SOME FREE STUFF and think of me.

You are about to view XXX! Would you like to continue?

My son, who is 11, asked me last nite when his penis will get bigger. HOW does a Mom answer this question? I did the only thing I knew to do. I googled 'puberty' and read aloud key points to him.

But it wasn't enough. "BUT WHEN WILL IT GET BIGGER?" he asked. Like an idiot, without thinking a bit, I googled something about getting a big penis.

BIG MISTAKE. Don't ever do that. At least not with a child sitting next to you. My son got an eyeful of porn the likes of which I didn't see until I was in my 20's. I quickly covered his eyes and shut off the monitor.

NOW, we all know how easy it is to pull up porn. Sometimes you don't even mean to do it. So why not WARN people when it's about to pop up? For instance, before it presents itself, why not have something come up that says:

YOU ARE ABOUT TO VIEW A SITE THAT CONTAINS NUDITY

AND GRAPHIC SEX.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO CONTINUE?

I think this is a FANTASTIC idea, don't you? What would it take to institute something like this? I'd really like some suggestions.

Wanna feel old? READ THIS.

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1987.

• They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
• Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
• Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
• The CD was introduced the year they were born.
• They have always had an answering machine.
• They have always had cable.
• They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
• Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
• Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
• They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
• They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or "de plane, Boss, de plane."
• They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.
• McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
• They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

Do you feel old yet?

Johnny Fairplay gets "played".

Remember Johnny Fairplay from Survivor a few years ago? God, I HATED this guy! Apparently, I'm not the only one as he has the distinction of being the least popular player to have ever been on Survivor. He's the moron that told fellow players that his Grandmother had died, just so he would be chosen to win during a reward challenge. (his Grandmother was alive & well)

So you can imagine my pleasure when I saw this video of Danny Bonaduce slamming him to the group during an awards ceremony. Johnny Fairplay lost several teeth due to the slam, and he is, of course, planning on suing. I am suddenly a HUGE Bonaduce fan!

Turnaround really is Fairplay. SUCKER.

Shouldn't doughnuts be a choice?

A Senior Center in New York, which once received FREE day old bakery goods, has now been ordered to begin refusing the pastries. WHY? Because the county Office for the Aging sent a memo to senior nutrition centers announcing that the doughnuts didn't meet nutritional guidelines set by the Older Americans Act.

SO WHAT?

Should it or should it not be these people's decision to eat a friggin' doughnut? They are SENIOR CITIZENS!!!! These people have raised children, worked jobs, fought in wars, and by God if they want to eat a friggin' doughnut why is it ANYONE'S business to stop them?

Granted, the Seniors are still permitted to walk across the street to buy themselves pastries. That hasn't been taken away from them. Yet. But, stop and think that most Senior Citizens live on very limited incomes. They may not have the money to spare. Also, some may not be in good enough health to do something as simple as walk across the street.

It may seem like a small issue on the surface, but to me it's about the RIGHTS of others. They are adults. And if they want to make an unhealthy decision to eat junk food, them LEAVE THEM THE HELL ALONE! Sadly, for some of them, it could be the only thing they have to look forward to. Society shits on them, children forget about them......let them have what makes them happy.